Thursday, June 8, 2017

All Aboard the Crazy Train

Have you ever had that moment in life or in parenting where someone asks "where are you headed" and the only thing that comes to mind is "crazy"?  I don't know how many times I've said that to my kids as a response to "where are we going".  In this thing called life, things can get crazy and it sometimes feels like you're sinking.

I've been blessed to be married for about 12 1/2 years now and Pat has become my confidante, cheerleader, comfort, and rest.  At the end of the day I know I have my family who always has my back no matter what life may throw our way I know we can get through it together.  Through the years I've had to really think about who I am now and who it is I want to be or who I think God wants me to be.  It's hard sometimes to figure out what your purpose is in this life or what you're put here to do that really brings glory to God and that you just absolutely love doing.  Just the other day I was sitting at work and I was thinking, man I really like my job.  I get to meet new people all the time and I help keep myself and my recruiters organized but is that really my calling?!  Is that really what I was put here on earth to do?

As much as I hate to admit it because I'm almost as old as his mother, I am a Justin Bieber fan.  Don't hate me!  Anyway, I've found myself listening to some of his interviews he's done recently and just things he's said and how he's changed.  I remember when Pat and I were about his age, early 20s and it felt like we were being pulled in a million directions.  I was a new Christian myself and Pat was as well.  We were trying to navigate through figuring out who we were and what we needed to become.  We both knew we wanted to have kids and start a family and we had some mentors and absolutely amazing friends that we could trust and bounce decisions off of that were much further along in their christian walk than we were.  I'm so thankful that we had those friends then and that we still have those friends today.  There have been so many times in my life where I just needed someone to listen, other times where I needed Godly advice from someone who wasn't afraid to tell me the truth but to tell me in love.  Back to the Biebs...I think about how hard is was for me and for Pat being average joe's trying to navigate that time in our lives.  I cannot even imagine what it's like for a star, any star, to go through that time in their life, feeling alone, vulnerable, and just sometimes lost.  I think it's amazing that with him being so young and as rich and famous as he is that he seems to be grounded and he's been able to seek out mentors that really speak life into him, help him through his struggles.  I can't imagine how hard it must be to find people who you can actually trust and aren't just after you for your fame or fortune.

The more I thought about the Biebs the more I realized, he's away from his family so much.  Touring the world and being gone so much has to be hard.  Having to put on a smile when you're having a bad day or when you're feeling lonely or sad I'm sure is tough.  Something that popped in my head as a comparison when my mind was just wandering aimlessly while thinking about this the other night is our friends that are more like family went through something similar.  Granted they're not superstars or rich and famous but they gave up everything, traveled the country to raise money to be able to become missionaries in another country.  They're away from everyone and everything they knew to give selflessly to those around them.  I thought about while traveling how many times did they get a home cooked meal, how many times did they get to just relax and rest, how many times did they get to stay in a home instead of just a hotel.  Here's what my thinking is: One of my very favorite things to do was to have them stay with us when they came through St. Louis.  Even though our home is small and it was a total of 9 of us staying here, I loved every minute of it.  I liked making food for them, giving them a home to relax, feel rejuvenated because here's the thing, when you're at our house I don't wait on you.  We want you to be comfortable with making yourself at home.  If you're thirsty grab a drink you shouldn't have to ask.  I was just thinking how awesome it would be to be a "host home" for missionaries passing through.  One of my love languages is Acts of Service.  I love doing things for people and just seeing them happy and enjoying their time.  I want my life to make a difference in others, not merely go to work, come home and go to bed.  Who's with me?!